This is a follow-up to Part 1 where I described the things I did to try and get “unstuck”. Like I mentioned in the last post, for a long time I felt stuck, like I was aimlessly existing. I was searching for an answer, but it was unclear for what. Little did I know the actions I would take to get out of this funk would also help me grow and get to a better place.
Listed below are more of the things I tried.
Lots more reading! And getting a library card
I’ve found that reading more has lowered my stress, increased my creativity, and improved my cognitive abilities (I feel I have better concentration and focus). This combined with cutting out screen time seem to have made the biggest impact on getting “unstuck”.
I had not been an avid reader from 2009 until 2023. If I had read more consistently over the years, I do think I would be in a much better place creatively and professionally. I read maybe 2-3 books per year whereas now I’m averaging about 2-4 per month, and sometimes more.
I first purchased used books on Amazon (I liked purchasing books used because it felt less wasteful), but it quickly turned into an expensive habit. Not only that, but I would purchase books only to learn that I did not like them at all once I started reading them and it felt not right to return them back to Amazon. Around this time, I realized the library was close by! And so we signed up for library cards and I’ve been frequenting the library ever since.
I love that I can request books to be held and picked up quickly; and I also love that if I’m not feeling a book, I can return it no problem. It feels so much less wasteful than purchasing books. At our library we have 21 days to return a book, and as long as no one else has that book on hold, we can renew it up to 3 times. Our library also allows up to 50 total items to be checked out at one time, with a limit of 10 eAudiobooks or eBooks out at one time.
A morning routine
A morning routine has helped separate my work self from my personal self, which has helped reduce my stress levels and helped me find more of “me”.
Before COVID and working remotely, I always had 30 min to myself commuting to and from work in the car. It seems like immediately waking up and getting on my laptop for work over the course of 3-4 years has started to take a toll on my not being able to separate myself from work and therefore my entire day and self became work (especially since I will sometimes work late). This therefore puts some sort of cognitive load on me by always being “on” and thinking about work constantly.
I recently have started to wake up earlier to make coffee and read for 30 minutes to an hour before starting my work day. This morning routine has given me more space to separate me from my work day and is now something I look forward to every morning. I’ve learned that I need to find more ways to create boundaries for me and my work, which has been hard to do since my office is in my home.
Getting more involved in the community
Searching for local events has helped me feel more connected to our community. While this has helped a little on my path to getting unstuck, I haven’t found the right groove/consistency yet.
Local events and classes
Mr. Nacho and I decided to go to weekly Tai Chi classes which have been fun to try something new and get our bodies moving. It’s definitely been different, and we are definitely some of the youngest participants, but I like what I have learned so far.
We also have taken part in different walks and talks offered we can find through local organizations, and hopefully we’ll get to take some classes like blacksmithing, pottery, or stained glass.
Searching for volunteer opportunities
If I were to find the right consistent volunteer opportunity for me, I think I would feel really fulfilled. However truthfully I have not found the right place to volunteer quite yet, and it seems more difficult than I thought and I’d prefer not to have one-off volunteer events but something more consistent. Any ideas are greatly appreciated 🙂
To search for ideas, I googled “volunteer opportunities” and searched local Facebook and Reddit groups and they seemed to be the typical animal shelter food bank opportunities, which don’t feel like the right fit for me. I attended a volunteer orientation for a local homeless shelter, but there was no post-orientation follow-up and when I emailed inquiring about available opportunities, I did not receive a response. Another thing I tried was emailing contacts from articles in the local paper and one organization responded. I met with the Executive Director and had a 1-1 volunteer opportunity with a member/resident, but also did not feel so fulfilling.
I feel bad that I am choosing to not continue doing something that I know is good to do, but just doesn’t make me feel fulfilled. At this point in time I will continue to research and maybe even just try out some opportunities that don’t seem like the right fit, just to see what I learn. Maybe more opportunities will come from them.
Strength and fitness
I know physical fitness can reduce stress and increase energy, so in addition to walking around the neighborhood, I wanted to engage in different types of fitness to boost my overall well being. Making the time to create a routine I expect will be another way I continue to create boundaries for myself and work.
Krav Maga and Muay Thai were interesting thought experiments
I’ve never learned to fight and I want to see if I can learn how. The last thing I want is for my first fight to be in a real life situation. The farthest I got was an intro class for Krav Maga which I loved, but didn’t end up going again. Hesitation with starting something new, still feeling unfamiliar and sparring with people I didn’t know, these are possible reasons for why I did not get my butt into gear and start going again. This is where the lack of discipline got me.
I also started researching local Muay Thai gyms in the area to try out. There was one that had classes for women only that I thought could be great to start meeting consistent friends at, but again the unfamiliarity with this style of fighting, sparring with strangers, and also that this facility was 15-20 minutes away are all reasons why I never ended up trying this out.
Finally joined a local gym
Local gyms feel the most familiar to me. I’ve only joined a local gym in the last month or so of writing this. Since COVID, I had lost the discipline and routine of going to a gym. I made an excuse that I couldn’t go due to my long-lasting injuries from times past and didn’t have time for the gym due to needing to focus at work. I made excuses. It wasn’t until I was feeling in such a rut that I knew I needed to try something.
Over time, I tried to figure out what blockages were keeping me from getting to the gym. Turns out one of the biggest reasons was the anticipation of crowds and the anxiety or pressure of having to wait to use certain machines (like the squat rack, or leg press). Understanding this, instead of the LA Fitness (which gets extremely crowded), I ended up trying out two other local gyms that were more expensive but had less of a crowd. I finally signed up for one – and there is no contract so I can cancel whenever I want and choose a different one. Hopefully I stick with this and continue to see improved results both mentally and physically.
All right, I thought I was going to write more about writing and blogging as a hobby, but since I’ve written enough in this Part 2, that can be found in this unofficial Part 3.
